A Mumbai based superhero named ‘Superhero’ and an Average Pune Guy(APG) became friends. APG visits Mumbai occasionally to spend time with his Mumbaikar grandparents and that’s how they became friends(we are not at liberty to reveal more about the exact circumstances they became friends, on request by Superhero).
While Superhero can be a tad egocentric and ultra-sensitive, APG loves boasting about his city. Here are edited excerpts from their conversations that also give you an idea of some great reasons to move to Pune.
Note: All the below given conversations took place in Mumbai when APG visited (Exact locations are edited out, as requested by Superhero). Wherever that’s not the case, it’s mentioned so.
1. Close to Hill Stations
Superhero : Can I tell you a secret? You know why I don’t fly?
Average Pune Guy(APG) : ’cause, unlike Superman, you can’t fly
Superhero(moving closer): Nah, that’s just a story I cooked up for the media. The fact is I can fly higher than any DC or Marvel character, way higher.
APG : Then, why don’t you?
Superhero(whispering) : ‘Cause I’m afraid of heights, even the idea of driving up a really steep road scares me like a chicken!
APG : Aw, that’s too bad…If you weren’t an acrophobic, you would have loved Pune! There are a whole lot of cool hill stations to visit near Pune with friends and family….hey, don’t cry! Take it easy. I’m sure they’ll come up with a cure soon, you know the advances medical science has made over the previous decades are tremendous!
2. Safe City
APG : Hey, did you see this in the newspapers? The crime rates in Delhi have gone up! Thank God, Pune’s not like that!
Superhero : But that doesn’t make any sense!
APG : Why?
Superhero : ’cause I’m not there in Pune to keep the city safe!
APG : Now, listen here Mr. Superhero, I appreciate what you’re doing to keep the ‘city of dreams’ safe. But it’s not like all cities are in dire need of a superhero, least of all Pune. Our city is safe, even when you are out at midnight-something you can’t say about many Indian cities, unfortunately.
Superhero : Man, you know how to be direct when you want to, don’t you?
3. The Weather
Superhero: I’ve the power to control the climate around me so it remains pleasant all the time.
APG: That’s useless when Pune has a pleasing climate all year through.
4. Shopping places to fit everyone’s budgets, and needs
Superhero : You know what bugs me the most about this whole superhero business? It’s the costume. And these aren’t exactly what you can buy from a shop, ready-made in your size.
APG : Ah, no such problems when you’re a common man in Pune-whatever you want, you can buy.
Superhero : Oh, yeah-where would you recommend for the real-guy-me when I visit?
APG : I don’t know about your financial background, but if you’re elite, you can go to Koregaon Park or MG Road to shop. If you’re a middle class joe like many, FC Road and JM Road are the places to visit. And I can see that your weird accent doesn’t belong anywhere, so I’m assuming you’re trying to hide your real accent. So, in case you are a Marathi, the Peth areas are for Marathi centric shopping.
Superhero: Aw, shudup! Why’re you calling my accent weird?
5. Less Expensive
APG: I always wanted to ask you something.
APG : You ever bothered by the always rising cost of living?
Superhero : Of course, I am. Being a superhero makes living way too expensive as you must eat more and your job demands expensive gadgets and the need for secrecy and training requires special places-large places, mostly, that can be a strain on the wallet too.
APG : In that case, why don’t you consider living in Pune? It’s far cheaper than most metro cities in India. In fact, I remember seeing an article in ‘Times of India’ that had Pune as the seventh most expensive Indian cities.
6. The Infrastructure
APG : Why you looking so down?
Superhero: I was unable to prevent a bank robbery the other day. Though I got the intel on it earlier on the traffic kept me from reaching there on time….I know that wouldn’t have happened in Pune-he traffic here’s very much under control, I see.
APG : And you can also reach almost anywhere within the city in a maximum of 30 minutes.
Superhero : Don’t rub it in!
7. Quality educational institutions
(It’s a slow night, not many crimes show on the radar that Superhero has set up in his secret basement-at least none that he would need to interfere with. To while away the time, he’s chatting with APG online)
Superhero : m bugged thnkg bt how I keep myslf awake evry nyt 2 keep da city safe n yet no appreciation!
APG : wht ya mean?
Superhero : V suprheros r alwys discriminated agnst. Thre r no schools or colleges specially 4 suprhero kids, whn evryone knws v r spcial.
APG : dat’s tru. Evn pune doesnt hve that kinda places. Tho for ordnry people pune has gr8 places 4 education. pune’s also called the oxford of east, u know?
Superhero : oh is that so? ..well, dat’s ..wait! is dat a muggin’? ya it is. Gottago!
APG : Hey man, how’s it going? I see your cape has some grease in it. Back from some heavy crime busting activity, I suppose?
Superhero : Yeah…Most nights are wild for me..In fact, you also look a little ruffled
APG : Oh, the last few days I was at this week-long music fest -that’s why the ruffled appearance. You know how Pune has a rich list of cultural events to attend- from the International Film Festival to the NH7 Weekender. And the myriad parties on all weekends.
Superhero: You’ve that glazed look in your eyes which means you’re missing Pune.
APG : Yeah..
Superhero : But you reached here just today..
9. Sporting Spirit
Superhero : You know what happened yesterday? I was playing cricket with some dudes in the neighborhood and I got carried away and whacked the ball all the way to Mars.
APG : And so now they know who you are!
Superhero : Not really, just after the incident I mind wiped them-so they won’t remember it…You know, I sometimes wish there were leagues for different sports-made up entirely by super heroes. Just like the IPL that lesser mortals have. In fact, Pune would be the best place to hold the super hero matches. I’ve seen everything from Kabbadi to football and tennis being represented by Pune.
APG : Yeah, that’s a great idea! All the superheroes coming out into the open and making sports leagues, man!
Superhero(sighs) : We can only talk about it.
APG : Why:
If all the superheroes shed their secrecy and revealed who they really are, we and our families will be in peril from our enemies, of which we have many.
APG : Yeah, I guess..
10. The Booming IT industry
Superhero : If I told you the analytical power of my brain, I’m sure you’ll be blown away!
APG : With all due respect, I don’t think so. ’cause no matter how high it is, you are unable to provide employment for a lot of people, are you?
Superhero : I’m not sure I follow
APG : I mean there’s an incredible IT industry budding in Pune, one that’s second only to Bangalore in India. And the collective analytical power of all those computers brings jobs to a whole lotta people
Superhero: Pune, Pune, Pune! That’s all you ever talk about. I’m leaving!
If you by any chance have guessed correctly the true identity of Superhero based on this article, we’re sure he’ll be there to mind-wipe you soon. If that’s the case, we’ll ask him to leave the info in your mind regarding great reasons to move to Pune intact. For that’s something that could help make your life even better.